Changing down the gears

Aloha people!  On Friday I am flying out to Hawaii.  Sun, surf, sea and sky… it is totally my idea of Utopia.  Please excuse me while I imagine a sun soaked beach with a slide guitar serenading in the background… as you can guess my head is already in vacation mode.    img_9196

I am very grateful to have the opportunity to travel, especially as I get to spend this trip with my immediate family.  The trip comes off the back of what has been the most challenging year I have experienced in my career thus far.

This year I chose to undertake two different secondments, both with a high focus on supporting people through a turbulent change process in my workplace.  I know I have a natural strength for empathising and facilitating the development of others, but I underestimated how the challenges are amplified when an environment is dowsed in uncertainty.

During the year I was also involved in numerous activities including being a member of my industry’s National Executive Committee.  I also supported my family through a few personal issues too.

Psychologically I feel as though my mind is crawling towards a finish line. I guess the idea of getting on that plane has created a sense of anticipation, albeit a tired and fatigued one at best.  I am not going to beat around the bush.  My vase is empty and I feel exhausted.  I guess some may call it burnout.

The warning signs were tiredness, pain in the body, strained eye-sight, and headaches.  It later manifested into low mood, an inability to focus and concentrate properly, and a lack of interest in pursuing activities.  I would snap and take it out on my partner.  I definitely felt my mental health was sliding downhill about two months ago.

I remember the moments when I began feeling resentful towards others and then myself.  At worse I would blame myself for not being good enough and began doubting my abilities and talents.

Having experienced depression in my early twenties, I was able to recognise these were unhealthy thoughts and realised I needed to do something about it.  I was determined not to let myself suffer in silence.

Fortunately I was able to tap into friends and family who were able to help and ‘boost’ me in different ways.  If you happen to be reading this post, then I say a big THANK YOU to you.  Your kind words, pearls of wisdom, advice, jokes and laughs mean a lot to me.  I find it so amazing that there is a huge amount of aroha out there.

Conversations with others have helped me to put things into perspective.  I have opted out of some of my commitments.  I am reminded to look at the big picture rather than stay in a funnel.  I have been told many times to take care of my SELF.  People are way more understanding than we are lead to believe.

So here I am, sitting in my lounge reflectively typing and happily thinking about the cool Hawaiian breeze…


Here are some useful links on managing positive mental health:


4 Comments Add yours

  1. jmmillersite says:

    Hi Andrew – plenty of aroha is right. You engender as much of it as you give, and we will miss you so much from our funny gang of musketeers in the Exec. I just joined your blog today, so what a lovely surprise to read your post, and to see you taking steps to rejuvenate yourself – body and mind. I’m imagining you’ll come back somewhat invigorated, and with a determination to regulate yourself a little more than you have been. I look forward to seeing you in that space, and hope you have a wonderful holiday where the sun shines every day and the slide guitar plays. Maybe a bit of saxophone somewhere there, too….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Andrew Tui says:

      Thank you for your spirited words Jennie. I totally appreciate what you’ve said and I wholeheartedly look forward to hearing a saxophone somewhere! There are a neat bunch of people in the Exec and hopefully I will drift in again in the future x


      1. jmmillersite says:

        And you would (or should I say “will”) be welcome back with open arms. We’ll get a saxophonist in for the occasion… or a slide guitarist. You choose ;-).


  2. tracy l says:

    I hope you have a wonderful holiday. Soak up some UV and go boogie boarding, the best stress therapy ever in my experience! There’s something about water 🏄 that resets the mind and puts things in perspective. I’m not sure why. Sometimes feeling small in the grand universe and seeing fish and wildlife 🐟 just reminds us that some stuff is trivial and not worth worrying about, because the fish don’t worry about paperwork and meetings and deadlines.

    Liked by 1 person

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